to discuss, when preparing to marry for life.
1. As a couple, what are our hopes and expectations for our life together?
2. Is there any pattern of behaviour that causes concern to either of us?
3. What do we, as a couple, want out of our marriage? (be specific...)
4. Does either or us think our relationship will change after we are married? (How?)
5. Am I ever frightened by the behaviour of my future spouse? (When?)
6. What would be the appropriate level of confidentiality between us?
7. What values do we want to bring from our own families, into our marriage?
8. Do you perceive me as being jealous or controlling? In what ways?
9. Do you think we listen well to each other? How will we continue to do this?
10. Do I/you feel special in our relationship? In what ways?
11. How well do we know each other's health histories?
12. How are we going to divide up the household chores?
13. How far can we each pursue our own interests?
14. How will we make sure we have quality couple-time together?
15. Can we talk openly to each other about money matters?
16. Should we have a shared budget, once we have married?
17. Do you consider nights out and holiday breaks as necessities or luxuries?
18. Do we both know where our important documents are located?
19. How many children should we have, ideally?
20. When do we plan to have children?
22. Which one of us should stay at home after we have children?
23. What type of birth control should we use in planning our family?
24. Do you think faith and spirituality are important in our marriage?
25. Are we comfortable discussing our sexual preferences?
26. Are we comfortable discussing our sexual fears, likes and dislikes?
27. When making decisions, are we both willing to face difficult areas or do we try to avoid conflict?
28. Are there problems in our relationship that we need to deal with before our wedding?
29. How do you expect or want me to change?
30. Are we both willing to work on our communication skills and to be intimate with each other?
Best wishes in your life together. The Together Pre-Marriage Course Panel of Counsellors