"Mixed" or Interfaith Marriage

Interfaith couples (members of different churches) are most welcome on "Together" courses. We'd like them to identify themselves to us, to ensure that we touch upon on questions related to their situation. Since marriage involves sharing of life with another person, the couple should think about the level on which they agree on matters of faith and practice. Special inter-church pre-marriage courses are run from time to time by the "Accord" agency.

In Principle: Along with the other required documents, the Catholic partner needs a dispensation from the local Bishop for a sacramental marriage with a Christian of another church, or a non-Christian. In requesting this, say whether you want the wedding in a Catholic church, or in the church of the other partner. Presiding will be a minister of the church where the ceremony takes place, possibly assisted by a minister of the other Church.

If marrying a non-Christian, the pre-nuptial interview with your priest will be quite searching, about the Catholic party's intention to continue in the faith, and their sincere wish to pass on the Catholic faith to any eventual children of the marriage.These are basic conditions for having a catholic, sacramental wedding.

Promises: The Catholic partner gives a verbal undertaking to seek to have the children of the marriage baptised and brought up as Catholics. No explicit promise is required from the other partner. The Church recognises that he or she may feel an equal desire to pass on his/her faith to the children, and that this may well be decisive later on. Our current practice may seem weak and indecisive to some, until one considers the alternatives. A positive aspect is that it calls for discussion of this issue before the marriage takes place, rather than leaving it to arise as a contentious issue, later on.

Procedure: The Catholic party visits his/her parish priest (either of their original parish, or where they currently live) at least four months prior to the proposed wedding date, to explain the situation and decide on a wedding date. The priest will explain what documents will be required, in order to have a Catholic wedding. He will also arrange a date to meet with both parties, to complete the pre-nuptial enquiry with them. When the couple have received the required documentation, all of their documents are forwarded by the parish priest to the bishop's office for the required dispensation for a mixed marriage. Only when this is granted can a sacramental marriage be celebrated.

Within or Outside of Mass? In a mixed marriage, the couple may choose to have their wedding without a Mass, con the basis that the non-Catholic partner's family may prefer this, if they cannot receive Holy Communion during the Mass. An inter-faith marriage ceremony is an option available to you, with all the other elements given here for the ceremony, apart from the Eucharistic Prayer. Within broad limits, you can plan it for yourself, and clergy from both churches may play an active part in the celebration. Alternatively, it may be within a Mass, which is still the more usual form. In that case, the non-Catholic guests can come forward for the priest's blessing at the time of Holy Communion, if they wish. They would indicate this wish to the priest by crossing their hands in front of their chest. You should consult with your priest on this, so that he knows what you want.

Fr. Pat Rogers c.p.